Phylicia C.: Shattered by Loss, Sustained by Jesus.

I’m 24 years old and from the earliest time I can remember I’ve suffered from depression, anxiety

and suicidal thoughts. My mother and Father were in and out of my life as a child due to different

things like jail, prison, rehab and also just choosing not to be there because “it’s too much”. Not to

mention going through sexual abuse and witnessing domestic violence on a regular basis. So I

struggled with my identity, self worth, shame etc. When I was in middle school I heard my brother

was coping with his own problems by cutting himself so, in my naive brain, I wanted to see if maybe

it could help me too. I’m sure you can already predict the outcome… it didn’t heal me and now I was

left with being damaged mentally AND physically. Fast forward I was invited to Reveal in August of

2025 and from the moment I surrendered everything to Jesus I knew I wasn’t turning back to my

old life and I decided to get baptized in October of 2025. God has shown up in ways for me that

would take to much time to type and probably wouldn’t even do it justice. He started healing me

emotionally and spiritually, I wasn’t depressed anymore! I didn’t struggle with my anxiety and the

thoughts of killing myself no longer had a hold on me. But what I didn’t know was my faith was

about to be rocked in a way I never expected and couldn’t plan for. On December of 2025 the father

of my 2 young children and partner of 5 1/2 years died… and it absolutely destroyed me. This was

the person I grew up with as a child and dated my entire adult life. But I want to share something I

wrote in my notebook while I was at Reveal on 12/31/25 just 8 days after his death:

“As we move closer into the New Year I can’t ignore how broken I feel. I can’t believe he’s gone. I

miss him so much my chest actually hurts thinking about him. Alicia (my daughter) looks lost

without her dad. We all are! As hurt as I am I can’t ignore God’s work and how good He is. I know I

will make it through this pain with God as my legs to keep my standing. Psalm 13 accurately

describes how I feel and yet at the same time I also can’t stop thinking about God’s love and the

peace I’ve felt during this process. I feel like I’ve witnessed heaven. I KNOW Jesus is real. I may not

totally understand his plans but whatever it is… it’s good because He’s Good! ….. This gives me

hope for the New year”

If you seen me today I probably wouldn’t look like everything I’ve been through and is still going

through but I don’t want anyone looking at me and seeing my apparent “strength”. I’m nothing but a mess with a pretty pink bow on top, instead I want everyone to look behind me at the one holding

me up and carrying me through this season of life. Jesus IS my Lord and Savior and as long as I

have Him by my side I know I can get through anything and you can too!